Posted by: DD | December 20, 2010

Beauty becoming Bane

“Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.” – The age old adage and trite platitude actually does resonate some truth.

The world conveniently believes that beautiful women always have it easy.  Their beauty is considered to be the universal key to their happiness and success. They are not only the cynosure of most of the eyes but are also inundated with proposals of all sorts.

To anyone from outside this looks amazing and is enough to make them feel jealous. But I was surprised to know that these women who possess the lethal weapon of beauty are themselves not so happy about it. It all started while I was interning with General Electric during summer of 2010. While at a restaurant one evening, I met this incredibly gorgeous lady. As conversation flowed, the topic of ‘beauty’ came up which she ended with a remark “I sometimes wish I wasn’t so good looking”.

That evening ended but the remark stayed with me since. Over the period of 6 months, I discussed this with a few other very good looking women. Though not everyone felt as strongly as the lady in restaurant, but at certain level they all believed that it is not as easy for them as the word believes it to be. Below are a few issues faced by the beautiful women, that I could figure out during discussion with few men and women.

a.) Conveying the seriousness of her personality and ability

People have hard time understanding that beauty with brains can co-exist. Beautiful woman find it extremely hard to make the world realize that she has got more than a beautiful exterior. If a beautiful woman succeeds, people are often skeptical about whether or not she “deserved” the success. It is always assumed to be ‘because of her looks’ and her ‘extra-efforts’ that she put in ‘somewhere else’, except work.

b.) Meeting and dating men (Yes, believe it or not, it’s true)

Many men automatically assume she is unavailable or find her too intimidating to approach. Quite a few also stereotype her as either spoiled, superficial, or out of their league, even if she isn’t. Because of this, a lot of gorgeous women could wind up with men who are more superficial, and fall for them because of their beauty. It is more difficult for them to find someone who likes them for their personality and other qualities. Hence finding a genuine man is probably the biggest problem for a beautiful woman.

Now I don’t deny that beautiful women are very choosy/picky about men in first place and that adds to their own problems but if you take a serious look, they get more sexual harassment than genuine interest from men, because genuinely interested men are normally too intimidated by their beauty to approach them.

c.)  Getting admiration from other women

Now this is something that was a total surprise for me. In my experience, I have seen that many beautiful women find great company in other women. But my discussions with a few reveal that such ‘friendship’ is superficial. Many beautiful women are the source of envy for other insecure women.  Either out of jealousy, insecurity, fear, intimidation or spite, many beautiful women find it difficult to maintain intimate friendships with genuine female friends.

Again, I don’t deny that this may be because they are themselves a bit bloated about their looks but that’s not how most of the gorgeous women feel.

d.) Social Stigma and dogmatic beliefs

Given that a woman is gorgeous, it is difficult for her to find equally handsome man. Now, if she is dating a not so attractive man, she faces a constant social criticism from her friends, family and peers. Worse if the man has money. Her serious interest in man’s personality and certain characteristic goes for a toss while she is labeled as a ‘gold-digger’.

After talking to a few men and women about the subject, I am confident that everyone worships a beautiful woman – women want to be her and men want her, both of them for her looks and probably not for who she is. Now I realize why the lady in the restaurant felt the way she did. That remark now makes more sense than it did that time and being beautiful suddenly feels a shade gloomier.

I would be happy to have 3rd party opinion. Comments section awaits your views. 🙂

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Responses

  1. Deepesh bhai u r definitely underestimating those beautiful women who know how to wield this weapon for their means.. they can be ruthlessly powerful..
    They make the deadliest foes.. 😛

    • Chirag, not all ‘beautiful’ women are foes. After all, women are the best thing that has happened to mankind. And beautiful women are the ‘cream’ of the lot 😛

  2. nothing to say….. m speechless…. 🙂

    • thank u hai Nehaji 🙂

  3. I agree with the points made in the post but these are just few of the cons a beautiful girls face compared to a huge number of pros.If it was seriously possible I can assure you no good looking women in this world would go for average looks let alone below average.
    I would relate these problems to another age old adage Man(as in human kind) can never be satisfied of whatever they have they always want more or have complains.
    what say 🙂

    • 100% agreed with every word of your comment Aditya. 🙂
      But I just wanted to bring out the fact that being beautiful is not all rosy for the ladies. It has its negative side too and trust me, some of the ‘genuine’ gorgeous women are willing to be ‘not-so-beautiful’ in exchange for better life.

      But yes, not every gorgeous women is unhappy, for obvious reason.

  4. I guess all these disadvantages are faced by those beautiful women who are really genuine,down to earth,intelligent and talented. You must have met the same kind in the restaurant. And of course these are created by the ones who are aware of their beauty and how that can be used 🙂
    but I must say, In todays times the first kinds are hard to find 🙂
    I hope you are in touch with the restaurant one 😀

  5. Hey Deepesh…..nice post…………
    Somehow you gtalk status “Do you think beautiful women have it easy in the world? Probably not. https://deepeshdhakad.wordpress.com/” made me think it would be something else 😛 and I was curious as to what have “you” got to say on it…..
    But thankfully it turned out to be something else……hehehehe
    Needless to say……this one is just as good as your previous posts……


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